A distorted shadow follows you in your dreams
In your familiar self destruction
Chaos lulling into parallel schemes
Comforting you with indulging gratification
Love once existed in the eyes of newborn
Soon castrated by a fallible horizon
Ambivalence is home to me
In varying extremes that I cannot escape
Happiness has washed over me
Like a fading cloud
Trying to grasp what has come to pass
Memory obfisticated in a chemical sleep
Years ago I thought I would succeed
In your arms, you never cared who you were before
Or how I was snidely detached
the feelings were blurred
too obscure to comprehend
My impure thoughts
they frightened you
a grinning taboo of sin
Valiantly molding into a fracture of normality
Change is overwhelming when you've never embraced it
the words that crumpled away
burned into my pores
was it in vain?
these people how are they so full
of everything I feel I can never become
I can never erase
the sinking ships and mistakes
tracking me down so shamelessly
your lack of tact is going to put me in my grave
you were never aware of how you stung
the rising sun of my scattered integrity
how we use to laugh at the freaks
that have suddenly become us
In the cold white trash rain
full of failures, and nobodies
that we were destined
to face in unwashed mirrors
during God's quiet introspection
of our secret revolving hells
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